People didn’t tent to talk about funeral much. Then covid -19 hit, and we all HAD to talk about it, but once the headlines hit about the restrictions and how awful it was going to be, even less people wanted to talk about it.
So covid or not – let’s talk about funerals.
What is a funeral anyway?
Well, the word FUNERAL comes from the Latin word FUNUS, which means corpse.
So technically, a funeral ceremony or service, where the corpse is present. The coffin, or shroud is in the room with you, being home to the deceased.
A Direct funeral contains no ‘invited’ mourners. It will only be the funeral director and the Chapel assistant. You can pay for a priest or a celebrant to attend, should you wish to do so. There is no ceremony or service, or witnesses. It is purely about the disposal of a body in a dignified manner.

A funeral ceremony
A funeral ceremony is about the coming to in both grief and sorrow, joy and love, to pay your respect to your loved one in person. To be in the room with them. To be able to place a rose on their coffin should you wish to do so. It’s about being there to say goodbye and to witness the farewell of their body, their shell.
Sadly, over Covid -19, this could not happen very much, and when it did, it was under strict restrictions that gave a very different feel to the ceremony.
I did funerals during the pandemic. Still am. We had social distancing in households, masks were worn, and we were only allowed 8 mourners, BUT I have an amazing array of suppliers that enabled me to offer live-streaming – both inside and outside, as well as photography.
People across the world could still come together – albeit virtually.
The ceremony and the burial or cremation do not have to happen in the same place, but they tend to. Although, now of course people have either had to separate the two, or now chose to separate the two.
I specialize in natural burials, so here is me standing next to a wonderful woman – whom I had met several times as we planned her funeral together. Her family were Muslim and flew over from their homeland. It’s traditional to wear white – so I did.

She chose a wooden coffin, and this uplifting glass pavilion in a nature reserve burial ground at Clandon Wood in Surrey. After the ceremony inside, we processed outside to her chosen plot for the final farewell, with a horse-drawn cart.


A celebration of life
Technically, does NOT have the loved one present in their physical form. It is where people come together to celebrate their loved one’s spirit, soul, legacy and memory in a way that is positive and thankful. A Celebration of life is a ceremony, so does not have to have religious or spiritual content, but can do if you chose to do so. It’s a much more uplifting and celebratory feel to ‘mourning’.
A memorial ceremony
Does not have the deceased present, much like the celebration of life, The tone is very different. It is more sombre, sober prayerful and reflective. Quite gentle. Thanks is also given.
IF you go for a memorial service, rather than a ceremony, it would be given by an ordained person, so must contain a religious element. Service is religious, Ceremony is not, but can be spiritual.
Body or ashes?
During Covid-19 people were not allowed to attend the funeral (bar 8 people), so the families will be looking at doing a Celebration of life, or a memorial for their loved one when restrictions are lifted and people can come together again. Cremations were encouraged if it was a COVID_19 case, so many people have their loved one’s ashes.
Let us intern them. They have a place, and you have somewhere to visit. Internment, or burial, can be that of a body, or of ashes.
If a Natural burial had been the ideal, then you can still have an internment of their Ashes. Here is a lovely biodegradable ashes urn. The loved ones can paint them and decorate them if they wish. I also think an Acorn pod is lovely. Check out www.ecopod.co.uk
I’ll be doing a blog on natural burials as a whole, so keep and eye out for that.
Get in touch – to talk about your plans, to ask for recommendations, to pick my brain, or of course – To help you say farewell for now to your loved ones with care, attention and devotion.